Monday, December 27, 2004

Things I'm doing today while working answering phones that aren't ringing

-noticing just how dry the skin on my butt and legs are

-fixating on my impending cramps

-obsessively checking my three email accounts only to discover I can get a good rate on a visa gold card, win a sony playstation by clicking "here", my grandmother likes to forward me things with fuzzy pink animals hugging each other, and my headhunter wants me to attend a party to introduce me to a new headhunter instead of an actual job.

-staring at the bag of half eaten carrots I have while thinking about which cubes could contain leftover Christmas chocolate.

-being cold

-getting hit on by mailroom temp while mentioning my "boyfriend" since I don't want to deal with gay questions today.

-realizing vanilla handcream makes you smell like a virgin pina colada.

-checking every club's website to see who's coming there even though I hardly go to shows anymore.

-forcing a smile whenever someone looks at me.

-picking dog/cat hair off my fleece.

-looking at the carrots some more.

-trying to find new joints to crack.


At 4:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i totally think you should just mention your l-o-v-e-r, repeatedly, with huge emphasis on the oooov part and then see how long you can go w/out using gender pronouns.

or, just mention your boyfriend is really pissed off because he can't buy more than 3 guns in the state of Virginia.


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